Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Hands on: iPhone X is nasty, gorgeous, erotic and arousing


iPhone X is predicted to break up many marriages. Photo: TYDN

CUPERTINO, Calif.—(TYDN) Apple on Tuesday unveiled its most erotic model ever: the buxom iPhone X, complete with a sensual voice and supple curves. iPhone X is simply tantalizing and responsive to the touch, TheYellowDailyNews has learned.

The arousing model, in both black and white, is guaranteed movie-star parking wherever this eighth wonder of the world goes, whether it be to the Playboy Mansion or to the halls of Hustler Magazine.

After Apple executives showed off the new iPhone X model at the Steve Jobs Theater here, members of the media were treated to exclusive, hands on iPhone X lap dances. Well-placed reporters, including one from TheYellowDailyNews, were lucky enough to have received enhanced, and private lap dances with virgin iPhone X models that had just been unboxed. Tipping was optional, but encouraged.

Here is what members of the media were saying about iPhone X:

"I immediately proposed." —The Wall Street Journal

"I hope what happens in Steve Jobs Theater stays in Steve Jobs Theater." —The New York Times

"Wait, what, you don't need to plug it in? Simply counter intuitive." —Wired

"I picked the wrong time to stop drinking." —TheYellowDailyNews

"Feels just right in my pants." —Ars Technica

"The extended battery life lasted all day and night." —Viagra Daily

"She only speaks when spoken to." —Guns & Ammo